Tuesday, April 14, 2009

A Word from the NOTY Committee

The question of the day seems to be this: Where would Barkevious Mingo be absent the backing of the citizens of Mingovia?

It is true that the Bulltron Regional No. 4 seed, LSU linebacking recruit and ruler of all he surveys is benefiting mightily from his minions. He trailed Crystal Metheny in Elite Eight voting when the trumpets blared. The polls have been closed for 12 hours, but the populace continues to back its king; he's over 60 percent now.

And now the calls to arms for the Final Four and beyond have begun. Quoth a Barkevious liegeman named Harris:

Velvet Milkman will be tough competition and Nutritious Love is no slouch. Rise, Mingovians. Show them the bloody fate of all those who would dare challenge Mingovia and her Ruthless Leader.

Last year, we witnessed similar advocacy on behalf of the eventual People's champion. Spaceman Africa didn't have the fan base of an SEC school working on his behalf, but he had acolytes around the globe who, in a pre-Facebook, pre-Twitter world, spread his campaign via smoke signal, Telex, carrier pigeon, word of mouth and plain old-fashioned email. Imagine. We didn't endorse Africa's quest -- we were in the bag for Destiny Frankenstein, the High Committee's resounding choice -- but we were powerless to stop it.

This year, we like Barkevious a lot. His adjectival first name is you-can't-make-this-stuff-up original. ("I'm feeling rather Barvekious today. You?") His quick, retro and unusual surname trampolines off of an energetic common word (bingo!) and even a wonderful 1970s NBA name (ring-winning New York Knicks fan favorite Harthorne Wingo). Around these parts, Rule No. 1 of onomastic greatness is that a name should have it going both ways. Barkevious Mingo has it going every way.

But that's beside the point, at least when it comes to rallying the troops. If backers of the pronunciationally questionable (not that that's ever stopped a name) Crystal Metheny wanted to halt the Crusade-like march of the Mingovians, they should have organized their own virtual militia. In America, that's how we roll.

So Nutritious Love, Velvet Milkman, Iris Macadangdang -- ye women of the 2009 NOTY Final Four -- the gauntlet has been thrown. Do you accept the challenge of Mingovia? Or do you capitulate without bowing an arrow or slinging a shot?

Spread the word. Get out the vote. Pick the best name.

Mingo dirigible courtesy of Every Day Should be Saturday.