Thursday, March 8, 2007

We're Thinking About Calling It `March Madness'

Let the Road to the Final Four begin!

The Name of the Year Committee meets tonight at an undisclosed bar in Tribeca to seed the field for the 2007 NOTY Tournament. Sixty-four deserving names—no play-in game in NOTY—in four regions named to honor some all-time greats, just like they used to do in the National Hockey League, only funnier and recognized by more people.

We’ve got the Bulltron Regional, after 1992 Name of the Decade Assumption Bulltron, a convict; the Chrotchtangle Regional, for 1991 Name of the Year Doby Chrotchtangle, a friend of the genius who also discovered Bulltron, a twofer nomination that might never never be surpassed; the Sithole Regional, for 1985 Name of the Year Godfrey Sithole, who has a doctrine named after him; and the Dragonwagon Regional, for 1993 Name of the Year Crescent Dragonwagon (above), a prolific author who, more important, changed her name as a teenager.

We invited anchorman and 2007 nominee Mario Hilario to do the play-by-play at tonight's event, but he has to get up early tomorrow to host NBC 10 Weekend Sunrise in Providence, R.I., and putter in his garden.